Well, that’s not entirely true. Mom read a status update about this topic on Facebook and left cash at my house. Oh mom!

The point is, I have a ton of food in my house that must be eaten, so I busted out some goodies this week. Black bean mash for tacos. It helps that my last CSA share included tomatoes, onions, and three little jalapenos. I knew salsa was in my future.

I made my corn tortillas like usual, except I’m getting wiser and using the power of a cast iron dutch oven to flatten them to perfection. Oh man. They turned out great. Reminds me why I don’t want a tortilla press taking up precious space in the kitchen.

The black bean mash is just as good as ever after being frozen. I’m always impressed at how this stuff comes back from the freezer just as yummy as it went in.

And the salsa! I have been dreaming of tomatoes, so making that fresh salsa last night was a dream come true. My CSA share was full of wonder this week: tomatoes, onions, jalapenos, bell peppers, corn, zucchini, peaches, cantaloupe. So much summer loveliness. I’ve already devoured the cantaloupe and the peaches. Had some of the corn tonight. Yum yum yum.

Of course, I was minding my own business eating one of my tacos when I was suddenly and viciously attacked by a rouge jalapeno with the urge to kill. I seeded those suckers, I swear! This one snuck up on me and nearly destroyed me until I quaffed a (glass of milk) potion that would destroy its capsaicin attack.  Oy.

So my battle to eat what’s in my kitchen is going smoothly. I really lucked out with produce this week, hoping the next share is just as awesome. Next week I’m making mujahdarrah to work down my rice, lentil, and onion stashes. I did use some of mom’s grocery money, but not much. I’m surprised how much food I have around.

• Zucchini
• Yellow Squash
• A banana pepper
• Small onions
• Cucumber
• Yukon Gold Potatoes
• Collard Greens
• A baby cabbage
• Pickling cucumbers

Yum yum! I will probably make the potatoes tonight (I wonder if they are best mashed? Maybe I’ll just do that!) and maybe the squash. I have a recipe for the collard greens that I’m going to try for lunch. It’s a pesto.

The pickling cucumbers will make refridgerator dill pickles. Mmmm.

I plan on roasting the baby cabbage Monday to go with Asian-style pork cutlets.

Onions are easy.

Me and cucumbers can’t seem to get along. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, but they are just not working with me. Hmm.

The banana pepper smells awesome… totally a puzzle. Maybe I’ll have it on my pizza tomorrow.

Anyway, off to cook I go!

So what to do? I’m not exactly under the poverty line, but my salary is lower than average. Not that I mind. A nice workplace with good coworkers, a fun atmosphere, and a chance to be creative and independent is worth the salary sacrifice and the difference from being in the far more stressful world of formal education. I know many people out there probably don’t think they make enough money to buy local and/or organic. I kind of thought that was the case with me, but I’m learning how to work with what I’ve got to make my food dollars matter. Pollan says in his book In Defense of Food that we ought to spend more on food and I understand his point. We spend much more on entertainment as a society and instead of buying good food that nourishes, we buy bad food that is cheap.

Here’s what I do to make my food dollars:

1) Go to the source. My two main sources of local food are farms. Not farmers’ markets, not grocery stores, but the farms themselves. I buy meat from a small farm. I drive all the way there (about a 30 minute drive but it is right by the gluten-free bakery I frequent so I can make multiple food stops. This is a monthly trip.), I can see how the animals live, and I feel comfortable buying. Compared to similar meats in the local grocery store, I’m paying about half as much. Half. All for a long drive. This farm doesn’t advertise, they sell directly from the farm, and customers reap the savings. The meat is more expensive than conventional meat in the store, but I am paying for happy, healthy animals that have lived a good life.

I also buy my produce through a CSA. For a reasonable weekly price I get lots of wonderful produce. I’ve tried lots of new things, including turnips, beets, and chard. I also get old favorites like berries, leaf lettuce, zucchini, and other squashes. Tomato season is coming. Potato season is just starting. The farmer gives tips and recipes for the produce. Overall, I spend less than I would at a market for more produce. Getting close to the source is worthwhile because I’m not paying for all the extras. I’m just paying for the delicious food!

2) Prioritize what matters and spend accordingly. To me, humane treatment of animals matters. I’m an omnivore. I eat meat and I enjoy it. But I don’t think my meat consumption should mean that animals must suffer through life. This is wrong. I want my food dollars to support humane treatment of animals. Some argue that slaughter itself is inhumane, but I disagree. Look at how animals die in the wild and slaughter starts to look kind in comparison. However, I don’t want to eat meat from a cow that has spent half of its life eating bad food and standing knee-deep in its own manure. Better to spend more for a cow to live on pasture.

I hope to learn to hunt from my father. Deer live a natural life in the wild. They are free-range meat. Hunting prevents overpopulation (seeing as we humans have chased off many of the other predators) and the meat is delicious. Will it be hard for me to hunt? Probably, but it could be a worthwhile skill to cut my food cost and eat healthy meat.

Local grown also matters more to me than the “organic” label. This label is dubious at best and the certification process is prohibitively expensive for most small family farms. The label means nothing. Look at the recalls of lettuce from organic factory farms and it’s hard to see why it would be any better than conventional stuff.

At the grocery store I usually stick to conventional stuff. Are there probably more pesticides on conventional produce? I’m sure there are. But I don’t like paying for labeling. I know potatoes and strawberries are in the “dirty dozen” of pesticides, but I  buy them conventionally anyway. I buy so many potatoes that paying for the organic label is simply not worth my while right now. I only buy fresh strawberries in season. Of course, things like onions and bananas I buy conventional, too.

For some people, it may be more of a priority to buy organic. Even organic labeled produce can have pesticide residue or dubious farming practices. I advise people to research what the label means rather than buying on gut instinct.

3) Skip the processed stuff as much as possible. I can’t even eat much processed food because I can’t have gluten. Most processed food is terrible and not as tasty as I want anyway. TV dinners are convenient if you can eat them, but they are not as delicious as making your own. I just make larger meals and eat the leftovers.

Don’t be drawn in by “organic” processed food. Are you kidding me? As if that makes it any better. It’s still processed food!

4) Know that you pay for convenience. Pre-sliced, microwavable, pre-washed produce is more expensive. The only “convenience” foods I buy are frozen veggies, which are inexpensive and often fresher than the fresh produce. I don’t buy the expensive “steam in the bag” veggies when I have a steamer and know how to buy fresh produce. I don’t buy pre-sliced. I have to thoroughly wash my CSA share. I found inchworms on my broccoli and a spider in my head lettuce. But I also paid less for better quality. It’s a trade off I’m willing to make!

5) Spend your other dollars on what matters. I love my budget. It means I can spend money on what I really want instead of wasting it. By eating out as little as possible (both for financial and dietary purposes), I have more money to spend on great groceries. I don’t pay for cable. I don’t buy things I don’t need. I don’t have a credit card balance. Better for me to spend on food that nourishes than junk food and junk stuff.

If you feel paralyzed because you want to spend your food dollars better and you don’t know how, start small. Start with farmers’ markets. Buy a little, check prices between farm stands. Ask the farmers questions. As you get comfortable, seek out local farms. Localharvest.org is a great place to start.

Figure out your priorities. Do you love produce enough to eat a reasonable quantity every week of a 16-20+ week season? Try a CSA. There is more commitment, but better prices. See if there are little farm stands around. Pay attention as you drive around. You never know when you might see a guy selling watermelons from the back of a truck! There can be good deals all around, but you have to pay attention!

I also caution you not to buy into the hype. The organic market is booming. Companies are seeing big profits from the organic label. But not everything with the label is good. Take time, do research. Don’t buy organic on gut instinct and remember that those small-time farmers may be using organic practices or better, but they can’t afford the pricey label.

I hope this inspires all my readers to learn more about local food and better food choices! Happy eating!

Dear Yan,

I noticed you are very tired lately. Every now and then you get up, eat a bit of food, get a drink, grump around, and then go back to sleep. You’ve lost weight. You’ve lost a lot of weight. I know we’ve been to the vet twice now, with a run of antibiotics that has done nothing to stem the weight loss. I hand feed you, but still your weight ticks downward.

Tomorrow we will try the vet once more, but I know this stresses us both out. Maybe we will find something we can cure and you can get back on your feet. But maybe you’re just tired.

I remember seven years ago when I got you. You were a tiny guy, so small and sweet. You and Bandersnatch were there at the pet store. I got both of you together because I knew you were best friends.

You have always been an odd couple. Bander is the dopey, smooth, sweet, quiet one and you are the smart, fluffy, feisty, loud one. You had your spats as roomies but you are the best of friends. I am glad you have been able to be friends for seven years.

I remember when you were so small you fit in your food dish. You would sleep there. Your logic was brilliant. Why not live where the food is, right? Of course, before long you were too big for your cunning plan so you resorted to other stealth tactics for getting your food.

What stealth! I called you my little turtle because that pigloo was your shell. You rarely came out of there, even for food. You would just drag food to the doorway and eat there.

You were also my little adventurer. You’d go exploring when you were out, checking out the places and the people. You loved my family members, but you would always perk up when you heard my voice from another room. Once, you left the room you and Bander were in while I was cleaning the cage, determined to find me. Of course, you didn’t get far down the hall before you got scared, but you took the first step. You always ran to me when you were afraid.

But life has not always been good to you. During my second week of teaching, I came home on a stressful day to find you with your head twitching and your eyes clouded. I was terrified. We went to the emergency vet. You got a subcue, which you hated (and promptly registered a complaint!). You also got Baytril. You hated Baytril. Every dose was a fight. You walked like a tiny furry drunk and I wasn’t sure if you were going to survive. I had to separate you from Bandersnatch, who tried his hardest to break you out of your little prison.

But you bounced back. You even bounced back from another ear infection, and another. We haven’t had an ear infection in years.

When you were well, you were often up to mischief. You and Bandersnatch ran laps around the cage, your fat little bodies hitting the walls of the cage so much that it woke me up at 5am most days. You flipped the pigloo and chewed on things. You’d always look at me like, “I so did not do that.” But I knew the truth.

You have always loved your food. How many days I woke up to angry wheeking or came home and sat down only to hear you demanding food! The best hay, delicious veggies, whatever you wanted. If I didn’t deliver fast enough, I sure heard all about it!

I know we trust each other. Through every illness you’ve had, I’ve seen the trust you put in me. It is more trust than I ever imagined a small animal could put in a human. You’ve learned to take your medicine nicely and until recently you even took hand-feeding well. You have provided wonderful hugs and cuddles when I haven’t felt well.

I know you are very tired right now. Seven years is a long time for a guinea pig to eat and sleep and explore. You’ve had more illness than anyone should have. You’ve always been a fighter, but as the ounces tick down little bits of your spunk and attitude and disappearing with the weight.

Tomorrow will be hard. I don’t want to take you back to get poked at again, but I want to give you the best. Maybe you have a few more months or even years to be with me. Maybe it’s only days or weeks. I don’t know. I will try my best and give you whatever veggies your heart desires.

But I want you to know, if you just want to sleep, then sleep.

I know someday I will try to wake you for some veggies and you won’t get up. I know one day you will find a new place in your sleep, a new place to live and eat and explore. You won’t get sick there. It will be a place where people don’t abuse animals or breed them for profit. You will have no predators to fear. And someday I will come and see you, you’ll recognize my voice, and I will hug you again.

I’m sorry you have had a hard life of illness. I’m sorry that these last few days and weeks have been so hard for both of us with the feedings and the weigh-ins and the vet visits. I’m sorry if I’m interrupting your rest for another cuddle or another offer of a treat.

But it is okay if you want to go. I understand. I will be sad and so will Bandersnatch. You will take a piece of my heart with you when you do leave. I hope you won’t rush out. Maybe stay awhile, enjoy the summer of new produce and new veggies to try. But I understand if it is time for you to go.

Just know that I have given you the very best I could, the very best life I could give to you. I know no other animal will ever be like you. You are the most unique pet I’ve ever had and I will sorely miss your wonderful little personality.

Much love and cuddles, little Yan. Let’s do the best we can. If you want to keep going, I will do what I can to keep you going. Otherwise, eat, drink, and be happy.

Update 6/16/10: This morning, Yan was still alive but in very poor shape. We went to the vet. He had low red blood cell and white blood cell counts and signs of liver failure. Yan was euthanized. It has been a hard day but Yan is finally at rest.

Here’s what I did:

• Last night, I put my breakfast steaks in a bowl. (I forget how much I had, maybe a pound?)
• Covered the steaks with soy sauce, sesame oil, ginger, a bit of garlic oil, more ginger than I intended (oh well!), and some five spice.
• Today I made rice, steamed some broccoli, cooked the steaks. Boiled the marinade for five minutes, let it get nice and thick, then tasted and adjusted the seasoning. Meanwhile, I sauteed some sugar snap peas, an onion, and two peppers.
• When the beef and veggies were done, I mixed them all together to heat through.
• Now I have the beef and veggie mixture and the sauce in separate bowls for storage. I also have the remaining rice portioned out for the rest of the week.

I’m eating this and it’s so good. The sugar snap peas are delicious, crunchy, and slightly sweet. The beef seems to have absorbed much flavor from the marinade. The ginger is adding a subtle heat. The broccoli is divine. This produce thing is lovely.

I have to eat some salads the next two days to consume all this lettuce and these radishes. Shucks! Going to try making a beet salad on Thursday. I’m hearing rumors of more garlic scapes and I’m pretty ecstatic about it!

Then I spotted the blackberries still in the fridge.

I wanted to bake them. Not in a cobbler, but in more of a crumble.

So here’s what happened…

• I preheated the oven to 350 degrees.
• I lightly greased a ramekin with a tiny bit of cooking spray.
• I put blackberries, freshly washed and dried, in the bottom of the ramekin.
• In a small bowl, I mixed 3 tbsp oats, 1 tbsp flour (both gluten-free), 1 tbsp brown sugar, a sprinkle of cinnamon, and 1 tbsp butter. I mixed this with my hands until the butter was mixed in. (You may be able to use less butter with no issues)
• This crumble topping was put on the blackberries.
• I cooked it for about 30 minutes.

Here’s what I got!

The blackberries exploded with delicious. The crumble topping was yummy. A very nice experiment.

Once upon a time I tried garlic scapes. They are majorly yummy, especially if you happen to like garlic. They are going to be “pesto’d” a la this recipe from Serious Eats. Mmmmmmmmmm.

Tonight I added some steamed broccoli to some existing teriyaki pork. The same will happen Saturday and however long I still have teriyaki pork hanging around.

Plans for this week:

1) Salads! Side salad with the pizza I’m having tomorrow, salad with beets and goat cheese for next week’s lunch enjoyment.

2) Mint syrup! I may make chicken with pineapple and mint, but not this week. Mint syrup will give me fun options. The pea and mint soup is good for lunches on these hot days, though!

3) Radishes will be used in salads and on toast. I love radishes.

4) Sugar snap peas and some of the broccoli will be part of a sesame beef stir-fry next week. I hate to be so crazy for Asian food, but these veggies play nicely with it!

5) The beet greens will likely be sauteed and served over polenta with a fried egg on top. Though there is a recipe I found for chard, polenta, and baked eggs that may be modified to take advantage of the beet greens. I figure it will be a nice breakfast on my slower mornings.

Mmmmmmm veggies!

I got three turnips with greens, a few radishes, about a pound, maybe more, of salad greens, some mint, some broccoli, and a bunch of spring onions.

The lettuce is yummy and great with a little dressing. I’ve been eating salads a few days here, will need to eat a few more. The guinea pigs like it and then they don’t, I can never tell. But it’s all good. I got some new dressings for salady goodness.

The spring onions are fabulous. I’ve been sauteeing them and mixing them with scrambled eggs. Apparently they freeze well, which is good because they are looking a bit sad after a couple of days.

I had the broccoli yesterday. I never cared for broccoli, but this was good. I steamed it and added it to some chicken teriyaki. Very tasty!

I had the turnips tonight for dinner. With my share there was an e-newsletter with a list of veggies and a recipe. This was a recipe for the turnips and their greens. It included raisins and onions. What a wonderful blend of flavors! The bitter greens were balanced by the sweet raisins and everything played nicely with the mild turnips. It was great to have a nice recipe to go with my share.

Starting tomorrow, the radishes will be eaten on buttered toast with a bit of sea salt.

The mint will be used in a mint and pea soup to go in next week’s lunches.

All in all, a great time! I feel like what I am getting so far is just enough. Sure, I am being forced (oh torment!) to eat a good amount of vegetables daily to keep up, but it is tasty food and I have been so craving more veggies in my diet. I’m eating much healthier! I promised myself I would try whatever I got, even if it was just once. I couldn’t believe the broccoli! The turnips were good, too! Maybe I can be friends with beets and okra as time goes on. Either way, I gotta eat my veggies!

I’ve also been cooking like crazy, trying to master my skills before the CSA starts on the 27th. I am looking forward to the joy of fresh, seasonal produce! Right now I’m just having fun cooking. Tonight I’m making a BBQ beef roast, braised in a lovely smelling homemade sauce. Mmm. I’m also making a quinoa dish for my lunches this week.

Anyway, moving on to the topic at hand! I learned a few months ago about something fabulous that Amazon.com provides. It’s called “Subscribe and Save.” Amazon already sells fabulous groceries (including great gluten-free groceries in bulk at way cheaper prices than my local stores). This concept takes it to the next level. With Subscribe and Save, you elect to get a shipment of selected groceries every month, every three months, or every six months (I think they offer other times for shipments, too). Shipping is free and you save 15% on what you buy, meaning I can get an amazing price on gluten-free foods. I save loads of money on gluten-free baking and pancake mix (about $4 a bag less than at the store), crackers ($2/box less), and oats ($3/bag less).

Nervous about commitment? There is none. You can unsubscribe at any time. You can skip a shipment or even ask for a shipment sooner if you need it and you still get the awesome price deal.

I don’t know how good of a deal it is for conventional products, but for gluten-free foods Amazon.com is saving me loads of money!

However, I do feel better and this evening I’ve started to get some of my energy back.

When I woke up at 3am on Friday, I was nauseous and wanted nothing more than toast. Just toast. Frickin toast. But I have no bread.

So I made bread.

I’ve had the ingredients for a long time now, I’ve just been afraid to try making it. What if I do it wrong? Bread is scary. Gluten-free bread is scarier. It can be crumbly or oily or hard as a brick or just plain nasty tasting.

I read the recipe awhile back on Wise Bread and was intrigued by how easy it sounded. It’s just mix, let rise, bake. No kneading. No magic bread dance. Way less scary than even the “easy” gluten bread recipes I’ve seen.

There’s nothing like doing math at 3am to determine ratios for the bread flour. I think next time I’ll mix all the bread flour in advance so it’s easier to do. A cup of corn starch (thanks to my fabulous friends, as a giant container of corn starch is the best gift ever!), a cup of brown rice flour, 2/3 cup of sorghum flour (this was thanks to another friend who spotted it on clearance!), and 1/3 cup corn (masa) flour. This made the 2 1/2 cups for the recipe and 1/2 cup extra. Next time I think I’ll try to measure out 9 cups of it and store it in a big bag or something.

Once I mixed the flours, I added the other dry ingredients and let the stand mixer do the hard work while I prepped the wet ingredients. Supposedly extra mixing helps make xanthan gum work, so I went along with that. I let the dough rise while I watched X-Files on Netflix. It’s the best thing to watch when you’re sleep deprived and dazed.

Then I baked the bread and got this beautiful loaf. It didn’t have much of a discernible crust, though I suppose baking it longer or having a steam bath type thing would have fixed that. But it was tasty. I ate it with butter. Didn’t even toast it till today. I did make the mistake of trying to wrap it before it cooled completely, but I just let it dry back out a bit and that solved the problem. I don’t know if it freezes well, but it sure was easy to make.

If I can just sleep through the night tonight, I think I will be done with this stupid cold! I will have to try.